Unit 7 writing by Andromahi

In recent years, geneticists have found ways to produce new crops by modifying them in order to eliminate starvation. On the other hand, there are some concerns whether or not the results of promoting these genetically modified (GM) crops is more beneficial than harmful.--> you can put it more clearly and grammatically correctly: there are concerns whether the effects of these genetically modified (GM) crops will be beneficial or not.

On the one hand, COMMA the percentage of famine have has increased dramatically worldwide. Unfortunately, COMMA 795 million people in the world do not have enough/ sufficient/ adequate food to lead a healthy active life. Consequently, COMMA it is crucial to be found for alternative ways to generate food to be found. The achievement of genetic modifications have has succeeded to raise the yield of Argentina, for instance,  to approximately 17 billion kilos only in 10 years. Needless to say that those statistics indicate successfully that GM crops can definitely contribute to win beating the enemy that is called hunger. The main thing priority/ consideration (we need more formal equivalents) is that only if a country has an abundance of products, will poor people have the ability to purchase food in lower prices. A number of them may even manage to be absorbed into the agricultural sector and have/ receive a salary.

Detractors, on the other hand, claim that due to the fact that genetically modified crops is a new practice, (there is nothing accurate) there is little certain data about these seeds' long-term effects and safety of use. It should can be argued that transgenic crops can cause allergic reactions. This is because their genome may contain genes an allergen, thus prompting an allergy to the person who consumes them (a food that prompts an allergy). In addition, COMMA it is believed by some people that GM crops can trigger the development of cancer. It is worth noting that there is no evidence for this. However, the government should ensure safety and set the guidelines.

In the light of the above, COMMA genetically modified crops is a controversial issue. Pros and cons should be undoubtedly taken into account. In practice, COMMA before promoting this scheme globally, COMMA IT is appropriate to conduct more studies/ more research about the effects. Only by in this way can people anticipate a brighter future.

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Andromahi, you dealt with a new topic well, but your text could be even better if there were more formal expressions at certain points and fewer grammatical or even spelling errors (look at the corrections in bold). 

Argentina should be mentioned as an example with all the proper linking phrases and explanations. 

The end of paragraph 1 was a little confusing for the reader, too. 

Overall, if certain things are improved, we will reach the desired goal! You are close, Andromahi! Keep trying! Christina 👌👏💝

GM Crops

  Lately there has been much debate about the use of genetic engineering so as to generate genetically modified crops.  It is a truism that (NO COMMA HERE) the intervention (=ανάμειξη?) of technology (or even better: technological advances) has provided tremendous opportunities to *enable our life less though/ for people to lead a more comfortable life on this planet. From my perspective, I think that genetically modified crops can make a decisive contribution to *come up against adverse realm facing adversity, several of which becomes evident in malnutrition and economy.

 There are several reasons why genetic engineering can chip in the rising of the economy/ boost or enhance economy. To begin with, it is known that farmers , who are in the bottom of social ladder**,are using this method (subject+verb+object) more and more this method in order for their yields fields to produce oodles of yield. The more the farmers produce ,the more they receive financially. Furthermore,  what production companies really prefer is a great amount of yields in order to *have the highest brands' generation generate/produce large quantities in very low prices . Not only does IS all this process of production be on the rise, but also consumption should occur three times more than usual. Last but not least, genetically modified foods are much more resistant through time. As a consequence, they should be used as materials in stock in case of an emergency.

  Another beneficial advance of genetic engineering is the alleviation of malnutrition***.  It is known that in some non developing nations, there is a huge part of the population who cannot merely make for a living , staying malnourished. Genetically modified foods may be deemed as an ally ti this issue of the poorer families due to the mass production of fundamental goods/ basic necessities. Some people, however, may claim that these methods of production are going to spawn detrimental effects into on the human body causing fatal ailments, COMMA such as cancer. So/ therefore/ consequently (=more formal equivalents of so), it is clear that mortality rates will absolutely increase. However,  in reality what these people forget is that GM (no dash in-between) foods provide the chance of a self- sufficient life. Not only does do GM foods not aim at elevated mortality rates,  but they also endorse people's complete adequacy/ self-sufficiency/ independence.

 Taking everything into account ,the obvious conclusion to be drawn is that the advance of genetic engineering has been crucial to humanity. But for it, percentages of shortages would be high and wounds' of whole world remain at the bottom (UNCLEAR HERE- don't think in Greek!) . To my mind , if we let technology interfere completely in some fields/ if technology is put into good use, then the future will probably/ definitely/certainly seem brighter.

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*If you translate these parts of the sentence in Greek, will they make sense? 
** Please avoid statements such as this one- they are unnecessary and politically incorrect. 
*** This should be your first argument in paragraph two, in my opinion, as it is the most important one.

Charalambos, I totally appreciate your attempt at elaborating on a very difficult topic we have not discussed in class yet. There are certainly areas that need more improvement (vocabulary used incorrectly, some grammatical errors, some unclear sentences), but I can see you are trying, which makes all the difference! If you have written this essay on your notebook too, you can copy my corrections and let me know which parts you found confusing. You are very close to passing! We can do this, adults' team! Christina 💟😎💪

Genetically modified crops

     It is a truism that over the past decades the earth' s population has increased dramatically. There has been heated controversy between proponents of genetically modified crops and detractors of transgenic foods (or: detractors of them- save the useful paraphrase for later) about whether it is reprehensible to adopt such a method. Personally speaking, I think that it is a moot point and we should shed some light on it/ some light should be shed on it- use the passive preferably.
     A sound argument in favor of genetically modified crops is that it is a significant means to tackle the world hunger. It is evident that many  people the world over suffer from malnutrition. By developing transgenic foods may lead to alleviate these problems. Furthermore, advocates of transgenic foods claim that crops are bound to give better yields resulting in low prices which will be beneficial for the consumers globally/the world over. Another point that they adduce is that genetically modified plants enable farmers to use powerful pesticides in order to protect their fields from unwanted weeds, meaning that their workload and expenses will diminish.
     On the other hand, opponents of transgenic foods argue that this phenomenon may result in many thorny issues which should be taken into account. First off, some people are profoundly convinced that consuming genetically modified foods may trigger health issues. Not only is the scientific research about these plants poor, but also there are already concerns from scientists who suggest that there are more to it than meets the eye. Moreover, there are those who believe that tampering with the DNA of organisms is not in the right direction. In other words, it is maintained that such a practise goes beyond the ethical boundaries and humankind is surpassing limits beyond their nature. Another point (unnecessary: of others) is that the root of the problem is not the amount of the yields but the fact that the majority of people who starve cannot afford to buy foods. That is to say, COMMA they urge the state to find different ways to address the world hunger, as giving incentives to young people to cultivate land and support them financially.
     By a way of conclusion, it should be reiterated that adopting genetically modified crops is a profoundly debatable issue and all aspects should be taken into consideration. It is a matter of life and death and we must be tentative in our judgements. I am totally  convinced that the state should fund scientists to conduct experiments and provide scientific results. Thus, they will enable us to choose wisely the best solution wisely. (verb+object+ adverb of manner)


Vassilis, wow! That is an amazing piece of writing on a topic we hardly had  any time to discuss! Also, the way you handled the issue was very clever and at no point did it confuse the reader, which is a feat in its own right.

Well done and keep up the effort! 

Grammar 4/5
Vocabulary 4/5-- possibly 5/5
Rhetoric 5/5

Total score: 13/15 at the very least! Christina 👍💪😊

GM food!

  Nowadays a problem of genetically modified food is widespread all over the world. More and more genetically modified food appear in our life. Gm foods designed to cover people's consumption.These products have high nutrional values and have the privilege of long duration. However, thera are opinions about potential risks and ethical concerns which have still debaded. So, should genetically modified crops advance in agricultural?
   In my opion, the genetically modified foods are beneficial in our life. Such a population increase, so the consumption icrease too. The agriculture can not afford this consumption.Genetically modified foods can replace the genuine foods.There are products that are modified crop, like soya. Soya originated from bean with icludes high protein. Most people choosing to eat meatless foods and soya helps for it. If people consume soya, the consumption will reduce.The food do not enough for all population.If there are abundant products, hunger and hamine will reduce! People go hungry either because they can not afford or because they do not have access to land on which they could grow it themselves.
   There is an another people's category believe that genetically modified foods should be banned,because these products are prone to diseases cause health problems and allergies.The modified DNA cause health problems because the human do not absorb them and it is dangerous to eat these products. Some products have different shape and taste with full of growth hormones. The most drawback of genetically modified foods is hormones. All diseases are caused from hormones and this is the reason for people choosing biological products.
   In sum up, the genetically modified food contribute in abundance products. Most people die from malnutrition which is serious problem from humanity.Even people bevieve that modified foods are unhealthy, we hold the production of these foods. Trangenic crops will make a decisive contribution to winning the war against hunger!


-------- Now here are my corrections:

  Nowadays, COMMA the problem of genetically modified food is widespread all over the world. More and more genetically modified food appears in our life. GM foods are designed to cover people's consumption rates.These products have high nutritional values and have the privilege of a long duration because of the changes scientists have made to these plants' genetic code. However, there are opinions about potential risks and ethical concerns which have are still being debated. So/ Therefore, should genetically modified crops continue being used in agriculture?

I have now broken down your paragraph in parts to better explain what I mean.

   In my opinion, the genetically modified foods are beneficial in our life. FIRST ARGUMENT The population increases, so do the consumption rates. The agriculture cannot satisfy the rapidly increasing needs of consumers worldwide. Therefore, genetically modified foods can replace natural products to some extent.There are products that are from modified crops, like soya.

SECOND ARGUMENT Soya originated from a bean with includes high protein. Most people are now choosing to eat meatless foods and soya helps cover their natural need for protein. If people consume soya, the consumption of other products will reduce.

NOW YOU GO BACK TO THE FIRST ARGUMENT - why? This needs to be done immediately, as the food is not enough for all the population.If there are abundant GM products, which can easily be produced in mass quantities, hunger and famine rates are expected to fall. (NO EXCLAMATION MARKS IN ESSAYS)

THIRD ARGUMENT- WHERE IS THE LINKING WORD? People go hungry either because they cannot afford or because they do not have access to land on which they could grow it themselves.  ---> YOU NEED MORE EXPLANATION FOR THIS ARGUMENT

 The reader must easily understand the whole structure of the paragraph, so be careful! 💟

   There are some other people who believe that genetically modified foods should be banned no comma because these products are prone to diseases are likely to cause health problems and allergies.The modified DNA causes health problems there is no way to predict how the human organism will absorb it; consequently, it might be dangerous to eat these products. Some products have a different shape and taste and are full of growth hormones. The most significant drawback of genetically modified foods is hormones. All diseases are caused by hormones and this is the reason why people choose organic products.

   To sum up, the genetically modified food contributes to an abundance of available products. Most people die from malnutrition which is a serious problem for humanity.--> THIS IS AN ARGUMENT THAT COULD HAVE BEEN MENTIONED IN THE MAIN BODY: GM CROPS ARE A WAY TO FIGHT WORLD HUNGER Even if people believe that modified foods are unhealthy, governments should not disrupt the production of these foods. Transgenic crops will make a decisive contribution to winning the war against hunger. (no exclamation marks)

You ended with an argument which should have been analysed more in the main body. It is a difficult topic which you understood completely alone, so that is a solid effort! Keep studying, wonderful athlete and blogger! I am also going to post some slides which will help you all to understand this topic a little more. Christina 💘

ECPE Challenge Unit 7: Science and Technology Videos

1. Watch this video by the Irish Stem Cell Foundation, offering a simple introduction to stem cell research.

2. And this on the biotechnology behind 'clean' meat and fish, and the future battle to win over the hearts and minds of the eating public

3. Looking forward to the essay, here's a BBC Newsnight report and debate on the pros and cons of GM crops:

4. Finally, we have read of the claim that GM crops are needed to help solve the problem of hunger in developing countries. Here are Greenpeace's objections to that argument.


 

GM crops

         Nowadays, with the technological advances it is easier for scientists to increase food production by altering the genes of basic foods. Proponents of this issue usually claim that it is the only alternative to remedy hunger which torments all the world. However, opponents of this issue doubt whether the benefits are worth the possibly disastrous consequences of interfering with nature. Personally, I believe that this is an ambivalent plan and many parameters should be considered to reach a final conclusion.
         To begin with, suporters of GM crops claim that with them we can face the essential problem of malnutrition and hunger. A huge amount of people are starving and the list of these people keeps rising. Due to this, proponents of genetic modified crops believe that is the only solution to this problem. Their opinion is mostly based on predictions that were made saying that the following years more than four billion people will starve and that our planet does not have the necessary land which we will need to feed everyone.
         On the other hand, GM foods are usually a subject of protests in which many organizations and opponents of them take part. The key areas of these protests are not only the effects of GM crops on human health but also on environment. Many people argue that not enough tests have been done to identify the long-term effects of GM food on our health. Some of them fear that certain GM crops may cause health problems ranging from allergies to kidney and liver damage. Only if this is true, will a vast majority of people be opposed to it. Furthermore, another reason for critisizing this new crops is that for some people it is unethical to tamper with the DNA of organisms even if we talk about humans' DNA or vegetables'. Last but not least, hunger and famine can, and often do, occur when food is abundant. People go hungry either because they cannot afford food or because they do not have access to land which they could grow themselves.
          Takig everything into consideration, I am inclined to maintain that genetic modified crops  should not be used until more researches are done in order to see the effects they have on humanity's health and also on our environment, No sooner will more researches have been done than more people will accept GM crops and, as a consequence, hunger and malnutrition will be surpassed.

~Genetically Modified Crops~

In recent years, geneticists have found ways to produce new crops by modifying the DNA of the plants.This new type of crops is known as GM (genetically modified) crops.Organisations which have been promoting these GM crops have often claimed that this is an effective alternative if we want to fight world hunger.On the other hand, there are some groups that doubt whether non-traditional agriculture will solve global issues, even causing further ones.Therefore, the question that arises is: Are GM crops a blessing or a curse?

Advocates of GM crops claim that they will solve the problem of hunger and malnutrition.It is added that mostly in the future these genetically altered seeds will be indispensable due to overpopulation.Over the next 60 years, it is predicted that there will not be enough agricultural land to feed everyone, so the development of these crops will surely be beneficial.It is also mentioned that the modification of plants contributes to the protection of them, since it makes them more resistant to powerful herbicides.

Yet, there are many detractors of GM crops who consider that not only are they unsafe, but they are also unhealthy.It is thought that even if food is abundant, hunger and famine still exist.Consequently, it is urgent that another solution for this global problem be found.Furthermore, many types of cancer, kidney and liver damage, to name but a few, have been caused by GM crops.In short, it is believed that this new type of crops is severely perilous at times.

The obvious conclusion to be drawn is that despite the fact that GM crops is a significant technological achievement, it is hazardous for humans.From my point of view, it is crucial that  we think wisely before taking the decision of any intervention in the nature.Moreover, it is essential that we figure out how major the problem of world hunger is and that GM crops cannot face a global issue like this.Only when we realize it, will an effective solution be found.

Genetically Modified Crops (GM Crops)

 

In recent years, geneticists have found ways to produce new crops by modifying the DNA of the plants. This generates genetically modified crops, or the so-called GM crops. The most common one, for instance, is soya. Albeit genetically altered seeds are considered to be an indispensable part of our daily lives, since they exist in almost two thirds of all processed food products, it is an undisputed fact that this agricultural patent is a double-edged sword. 

There are many significant reasons why GM crops are far and away vital. First and foremost, it is estimated that there will undoubtedly be overpopulation over the next 60 years. As a consequence, not only will there not be enough agricultural land to grow food for everyone, but also global hunger will dominate. That is, unemployment and malnutrition, which are highly pressing issues even nowadays, are going to exacerbate in the future. Furthermore, proponents of GM crops claim that traditional agriculture makes ample use of powerful pesticides, herbicides to name but a few, which destroy crops. Therefore, a weapon to alleviate these devastating effects of such an intensifying phenomenon is developing non-traditional farming. Last but not least, GM crops substitute meat, so vegetarians may be in favor of them, too. 

Nevertheless, it is urgent that we comprehend the contrary results of GM crops. Firstly, hunger and famine can occur even when food is abundant. People suffer from them on the rounds that either the percentage of exported genetically changed food is higher, or because poverty does not allow citizens to be provided with goods that satisfy their needs. A striking example of this is Argentina. Although the country is known for fertilization, the President's decision to introduce transgenic soya, which appeared to be a catalytic factor to decrease hunger in the beginning,(in 2006 the total yield was 30 billion kilos- adequate for everyone), did not turn out to be effective. In fact, hunger remained steady due to poverty and the fact that the exports of transgenic soya were more than the amount which remained in the country. Additionally, it has been identified that GM crops may cause health problems ranging from allergies to kidney and liver damage. 

Taking all this into consideration, there is no doubt in my mind that GM crops are an ambivalent issue. Only if we use them wisely and in moderation, will we have the ability to reap their benefits without taking mankind into the realms that belong to God, and to God alone.